MOM...God's Superhero

M - O - M

Who knew that three simple letters could be so packed full of hilarity, wisdom, and unconditional love? Only a "Mom" has the uncanny ability to make you feel happy, loved, embarrassed, comforted, and sometimes frustrated all at the same time. I definitely consider it to be some supernatural power that God bestows upon women at the moment of their first child's birth. It's as if a mom is God's version of a comic book superhero. She IS the Justice League. Her "look" contains power beyond compare. Yes, you know what I am talking about. We all know "THE LOOK." Oh, and how can we forget the other magnificent mom power known as "THE GUILT." This one works wonders with me...my mom has trained me well.

Along with these inexplicable magical powers a mom possesses, she also seems to have her own set of idiosyncrasies with which to completely embarrass or bring humor into her children's lives. This is most certainly MY mom. To say that my mother is crazy sounds a little harsh, but it is this craziness that has created some of the most outrageous and hilarious memories of my life. Let me give a few examples:

It seems as if my mom is like a combination of a Jewish and a Hispanic mother. Every fiber of her being is either spent trying to feed me or marry me off in order to obtain grandchildren. Most every phone call either begins with, "So, did you eat today?" or "Did you meet anyone today?" Many times, she even uses one of these questions as a bridge into some wacky idea that she randomly came up with that day. One such voicemail, "Hey, honey, it's me...your mom...the one who gave birth to you (THE GUILT). By the way, did you eat today? You looked a little thin the last time I saw you. So, I was thinking, with as much as you drive by yourself, you really should invest in a flare gun to keep in your car. That way if you run out of gas or your car breaks down at night, you can shoot off the flare gun for help...or, if some guy came up to attack you, you could just shoot your flare gun at him. There you go. Just think about it, okay? Alright, love you. Talk to you later."

Okay, first of all, of course shooting off a flare gun in the city would make so much more sense than just calling someone on my cell phone. Why didn't I think of that before?! Second of all, can you imagine my shooting off would-be attackers with my flare gun? "Oh, no!!! The chic has a flare gun, man!!! RUN!!!" I don't know...maybe it isn't such a bad idea. Hmm...

On being single...how could I forget the series of voicemails my mom left me detailing how I don't sound "single enough" on my voicemails. "Because" said mom, "What if some random single guy accidentally calls your phone and gets your voicemail? If you don't sound "single", how would he know to leave you a message about taking you out some time?" Yes, I'm sure that's my problem. Thank you, Mom.

On being too skinny...I have always been too skinny for my mom. I am from a stocky German family and to them I look like a poor, little starving child from World Vision. It's been my "thorn in the flesh" for most of my life. So, one time, a few years ago, I went to visit my mom in Georgia and about two days into the visit, she followed me into a bathroom stall at a Chinese buffet.
"Eww, Mom!" I said, "What are you doing?!" She gave me a concerned look, laid her hand gently on my shoulder, and asked, "Honey, are you bulimic? I'm really worried."
"What?! Mom, what in the world?!" I answered.
"Every time we have gone out to eat, I see you eat a lot and then you go to the bathroom before we leave the restaurant. I just want to make sure that you aren't throwing up your meals...you're so skinny!" I just laughed and laughed and assured her that I was not bulimic. I love food. She was pacified for the time being. However, days later she sat down with me, gave me a beautifully wrapped gift, and waited for me to open it. "How sweet, Mom, thank you!" I exclaimed and quickly unwrapped the gift. To my chagrin, it was a book entitled, "A Diary of My Former Self: One Girl's Struggle with Anorexia." Exasperated, I looked up at my mom and she said, "If you ever need to talk, honey, I'm here." Wow. Despite these funny stories of my mom's unmerited concern about my eating habits, I think I have finally convinced her that I do not have an eating disorder. This, of course, does not stop her from asking about what I ate for the day or what my current weight is, but it is progress. After all, it's her job to be concerned...she's "Mom."

I could probably fill volumes with all of my wacky mom stories, but I will save those for future posts. In addition to all of her off-the-wall antics, my mom has been a tower of strength and perseverance throughout the years. She has has loved, sacrificed, and lived for her children despite overwhelming obstacles. She truly is a superhero in my opinion. I have learned multitudes of things from her and tomorrow I will share a list of "Mom Wisdom" that I have gleaned from her throughout my life.

So, goodbye for now...I need to make sure my flare gun is ready to go for some pick-ups I need to do. Hey, don't judge...it wasn't such a crazy idea after all...

Love ya, Mom!


 

God Bless Our Military

Yesterday, I was making my way from the parking lot into the grocery store and noticed a 70ish year old man in an orange vest pushing carts. People pushed quickly past him...cars came rushing by in order to get a good spot. I ended up catching up with him and noticed that he was wearing one of those Vietnam War/Korean War hats...it was an Air Force edition. My emotions overwhelmed me a bit and I quickly went over to him, got his attention, and said, "Sir, I see that you served for the Air Force in 'Nam and in Korea?" "Yes." He answered. I reached out and shook his hand, "Thank you, sir, for serving our country." His tired eyes lit up for a moment. For a split second, I could almost envision a handsome twenty-something young man standing there in a sharp, crisp military uniform rather than the worn jeans and orange grocery store work vest. "Thank you." He replied. A tear escaped my eye as I watched him continue to make his way slowly into the store with his line of carts. I had just shaken hands with a real, live....hero. Wow. The one thing I couldn't help but think- why is a hero like that pushing carts at a grocery store in his 70s? My blood boiled a little to think of how little these men are compensated for their sacrifice and how much we take them for granted. How much I take them for granted.

So, to all of my service member friends...retired or active duty- thank you. You are my heroes. You serve so others can enjoy freedom. You deserve so much more than a "thank you" in a short blog post, but I just wanted to show and share my appreciation. 

God bless our military members!

Refurbished

"Damaged Goods"...

I was having a conversation with someone the other day and they made the comment, "Don't worry, you aren't the only one here who is 'damaged goods'." At first, admittedly, I felt stung. It wasn't meant as an insult in any way (it was said in a loving way), but my pride was a bit injured, I think.
"Damaged goods?" I thought, "Is that how I am viewed? I thought I was past that." Oh, how God likes to knock us off our little pedestal to teach us sometimes...

It is somewhat popular right now, in the world of technology, to buy what we call, "refurbished" items. I am not sure about most companies, but I DO know that when a person buys a refurbished product from Apple, he receives the same one-year warranty and, really, nearly the same packaging as a brand new item. Now, for anyone who has ever owned an Apple product, those one-year warranties are phenomenal! Anytime anything goes wrong on a product during that time, the customer simply brings in the item to an Apple store, the "genius" does some troubleshooting, and, if needed, Apple will simply replace the part or item that was having issues. I have never once felt stupid nor have I ever felt that I was inconveniencing the workers when I brought an item in to be fixed. If anything, the employees have always made it a point to show how glad they were that I brought their product back to them for a repair. The Geniuses understand that fixing Apple devices is not an inconvenience (even IF the customer may have possibly been at fault). Fixing and solving device issues IS, after all, why they are there. Something that is even more amazing to me is that their refurbished products receive the same treatment as their brand new items. Seemingly, they don't distinguish between the two.

Last year, a close friend of mine received a Macbook Pro for Christmas from her aunt. It WAS a refurbished item, but my friend didn't seem concerned. Why? She knows Apple. Their impeccable customer service, their top of the line products (even on refurbished items), and their commitment to their warranties, all gave her confidence that her "refurbished" item was just as mechanically sound and guaranteed as if it were brand new. You know where I'm going with this, don't you?

Back to "damaged goods"...
If the Apple company can take a creation of their own, damaged for whatever reason, repair it to the point of being practically brand new, and then give the same guarantee that they do for brand new items, isn't it possible that our God can do the same?

We are all a bit "damaged" and, yes, it is true, some of us are much more "damaged" than others. That is why I am so grateful to know that I can take my "damaged goods" to THE Genius for some troubleshooting from time to time. There have even been some pretty desperate times when I just needed to be "refurbished." How wonderful to think that MY Genius can fix my brokenness, repackage me, send me out, and then guarantee that anytime I have an issue, I can come right back for repairs. I don't have to feel stupid nor do I have to feel like I am inconveniencing Him because, after all, that IS why He's there. "The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart..."

Feel a little like "damaged goods"? Don't worry...you're among good company. I am too. God's currently doing some refurbishing on me at the moment. And, you know what I love about God's products? His are eternally guaranteed.

Hi, I'm Erica, and I'm a Mac...no...even better, I'm God's child.:)

A Man, A Maniac, and a Healer

A folded piece of cardboard and a tattered, old backpack.

Slowly, the grey-haired man placed his two items on the ground. He carefully picked up the worn piece of cardboard, opened it, and turned toward the street. A car stopped at the light close to where he stood. The driver looked over and glanced at the old man and his sign, “Why Lie I Need a Drink?” Trying not to make eye contact, the driver glanced back up just in time to notice the green light and quickly drove away. The old man rubbed his tired, glassy eyes.

“Just another drink and a sandwich- that ain’t too much to ask, is it?” reflected the man as he gave a shaky wave to the cars as they passed.

His slightly torn clothes, unkempt hair, and jaundiced skin all gave the more observant passerby the distinct impression that this man had struggled for possibly years with the "demon" of alcoholism.

The questions that always gnaw at my own soul when I see a man like this are: Whose father is this? Whose brother? Whose son? If I took a moment to look past the glassy eyes into the heart and life of this man, would there be a charismatic man full of hope and ambition staring back? Where did THAT man go? Was he forever lost in this endless ocean of hopelessness and despair? Had he for so long sought to drown his problems in the bottle that he had, in turn, drown out the ambitious man that once lived inside him?

A story from the life of Christ came to mind this week as I was thinking about all of this:

There was a man in the country of the Gadarenes that was known as a maniac who possessed an unclean spirit. In Christianity, we know him as the “Maniac of Gadara.” This man made his home amongst the tombs. Every day, he would go up and down on the mountains screaming, crying, and cutting himself. The people in the area had become fearful and had tried many times with fetters (leg cuffs) and chains to bind the man but to no avail. This maniac always broke free and no man could control him.

Enter Jesus...

Jesus had sailed with His disciples to this same country and as he was coming out of the ship, this maniac met him. That’s actually quite an understatement. The Bible says that “when he saw Jesus afar off, he RAN and worshipped Him.”

Now, I won’t go into the entire story but here is my takeaway- Jesus looked deeply into the heart and soul of this crazy, demon-possessed maniac and saw a man. He saw a life. He saw hope. That man’s life would never be the same again. His family had regained a father, a brother, a son. His friends had regained a companion...a buddy. The town had gained a powerful witness for the cause of Christ.

How heartbreaking it is to see those we love overcome with various “demons” in their lives. The situation can feel hopeless as we try to reach out in our own strength and “help” them by binding them with various “chains” that we think might fix the problem but...to no avail. Perhaps there are times when we have been that maniac and have found that the chains and fetters cannot control us.

This story shows us the only solution that can bring freedom from the “demons” of life and from bondage. The answer? Jesus. We must point our loved one to Him. We must lift them up to Him in prayer and let HIM be the One to heal them. They must come to Him. WE must come to Him.

Jesus, help us to see others the way you do when you look into their eyes. Give us your compassion and help us to point the world to You.

Moments...

Other than the Bible, I fully believe that Dove Promise wrappers contain incredible nuggets of wisdom to help us along in day to day issues.  That belief always inspires me to gorge myself on Dove Promises whenever I have the opportunity.  After all, I DO want to glean as much wisdom from their shiny little wrappers as I can.  ha ha  On that note, I opened up a Dove Promise the other day and discovered the following bit of wisdom:

"Enjoy the Moment"

What a truth!  I tucked the truth away in my mind and went about my busy day.  Days passed...and last Saturday I was once again reminded of this life-changing truth.

     We had just enjoyed a fantastic piano recital featuring many of Gordon and Kristina Alley's piano students.  Folks from various churches in the Denver area came and we ended up with about 120 in attendance.  Each student did a phenomenal job.  As beautiful, God-honoring music resounded throughout the auditorium, I thought, "I'm SO glad I got the opportunity to be a part of this night."  After the recital, we all gathered in the Fellowship Hall for some delicious food and fellowship.  I helped serve drinks for a bit and then decided to grab some food.  When I went back into the kitchen, I noticed a young lady from our church named Shay sitting in the back eating.  I sat down with her and chatted.  A few minutes passed and Shay went to go say "goodbye" to some people.  As she was leaving, Gordon and Rachel Alley's little girl, Autumn, came and sat down next to me.  Autumn is adorable and absolutely irresistable.  She is most certainly a difficult little lady to ignore.  I turned to her and started talking.  She told me about her day and...I listened.  I teased her a bit and snatched a couple of her chips.  She laughed and said, "Do it again."  And so, I snatched a few more chips.  We laughed.  I got up and refilled her chip bowl.  Then, she decided she wanted to tell me all about the "Almond radio" that her family went to see...(in Autumn language that translates to:  "The Other Rodeo").  As she started telling her story, I noticed some folks out in the eating area that I wanted to  see before they had to leave.  Something within me hesitated for a split second..."Enjoy the Moment"...was the thought that came to mind.  I looked over at my little 3 year old friend.  She was excitedly telling me about her fun time at the rodeo...and my distracted mind was missing it.  The Holy Spirit sweetly scolded me, "Erica, THIS is the moment.  Enjoy THIS moment.  This moment will never happen again.  Don't miss it."  I focused back in on Autumn's story.  For that moment, Autumn became the most important person in the entire world and her story the most captivating story that I had ever heard.  We had a blast talking back and forth about the rodeo and munching on potato chips.  For those moments, we were seemingly the only two folks in the entire Fellowship Hall.  After a while, Autumn skipped off to go play with some of the other children.  I watched her go and thought, "Twenty years from now, that little lady will probably not remember our potato chip-munching rodeo talk in the Fellowship Hall kitchen, but I WILL remember and will cherish this moment forever."

     God used that sweet little girl to remind me how important...how fleeting these moments are.  I remembered the few sweet moments I was able to spend with Shay that night...the wonderful moments I spent playing a piano duet with my friend, Kaylee (a high school Senior who will be going off to Bible college this fall...THOSE were moments that most certainly could never be reclaimed) and the precious moments that I had spent going soul-winning with my Pastor's wife that morning.  Moments.  How many moments in my life had I lived on auto-pilot?  Or  how many moments had I just muddled through...distractedly worried about what I was going to be doing the next day?

"For what is your life?  It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away..."

Life...a vanishing vapour...a series of fleeting moments.

Take heed to the Dove...

"Enjoy the Moment" 

Help! I Can't Sleep!

Well, here it is....for the past many months....or, how ever long it has been now...I wake up a couple of times throughout the night.  I do not...cannot...seem to sleep through the night.  Sometimes, I wake up with this ravenous desire to sit and eat a block of cheese (I know it sounds crazy...but, if I'm ever going to visit your house, you may want to lock up the cheese before I get there).  Other times, I am extremely thirsty.  Lately, I just wake up for no apparent reason.  Hmmm.  For the last 5 days, I have just suddenly woken up at about 3 am (This morning, it was 3:15 am).  So, I usually glance at the time...pray a bit...and make myself go back to sleep for a couple more hours.  Then, when I DO wake up at my normal time, I am overwhelmingly exhausted and it feels as if I never even went to sleep.  Strange, right?  After so many months of this, I finally decided to call my mother, the nurse, and seek her advice.  I received 3 responses:

Response #1:  "Oh, honey, maybe your body has stopped making Melatonin.  You should get that checked out because a lack of Melatonin in your body might lead to cancer and then you could DIE.  Maybe I should send you some Melatonin."

Response #2:  "Or, you know, you do tend to have low blood sugar...maybe your blood sugar is crashing in the middle of the night.  You really should get THAT checked out because it could develop into diabetes which could lead to blindness and, if not treated, you could DIE from that."

Response #3:  "You know what, Erica, this is EXACTLY why you need to move down here to Georgia with your family.  We could figure this out TOGETHER...because that's what families do, they solve problems TOGETHER.  I think the Lord is trying to speak to you here."

Why, when asking my mother about ANYTHING, does she always end with, "You could die from that."  or  "That's why you need to move to Georgia."  Well, I certainly don't want to die prematurely...so, what am I to do?  Perhaps if I started taking Melatonin, treated myself for low blood sugar, AND moved to Georgia with my family, I would see a marked improvement in my sleep cycle....or NOT!!  LOL!!!!!  My purpose in sharing this?  Not sure...maybe I'm looking for more answers...maybe I'm hoping to feed my hypochondria...or, maybe I'm hoping that someone will send me a block of cheese (I like Colby Jack).

If you ARE reading this, and you have any insight into my "Can't Sleep Through the Night-itis", please, please...leave me a comment.  According to my mother, this may be a life or death situation...be a friend...save a life.

Accepted

Have you ever been in a room full of people or even friends...and felt completely all alone?


I have...and often do.  This idea of "acceptance" is an area of my life that has produced some of my fiercest struggles.  Do people REALLY accept me?  Or do they accept the person that THEY think I am?  Growing up, I had to be the best...physical and mental abuse from a certain family member if I didn't meet up to certain expectations pushed me to work harder.  This eventually turned into an obsession to please people.  If I pleased them enough, I was loved and accepted.  If I performed well enough, I was loved and accepted.  If I failed, I was stupid and worthless....unloved and rejected.  Then, at 13, I got saved and gave my life over to God.  However, I still strove to meet a certain level of worthiness.  If I had the right standards...if I did all the right things, then, God would REALLY love me and accept me.  Oh, I realized that He accepted me for salvation but, this was different.  Standards became, to me, somewhat of a measuring stick for my "level" of Christianity.  Truly, they were all about me and how good of a Christian I could become.  Perhaps if I finally reached that certain "level", all of the people I loved and admired spiritually would REALLY accept me.  In college, I often wondered, "Would these people be so accepting of Erica Johnson if they knew the kind of home in which I was raised?"  Many times I even allowed thoughtless or harsh comments about my family to affect my own personal feelings of how well others accepted me.  I even allowed Satan to convince me, at times, that because my family was a certain way, people automatically associated me with certain sinful habits and lifestyles.  "Perhaps" I thought, "If I become exactly what everybody wants me to become, THEN people will REALLY accept me."  So, I tried to be what others wanted...but my deep longing for acceptance only grew.  I soon realized that people weren't accepting ME...they were accepting their idea of me.  Or, only a small piece of who I was.  It made me miserable...angry...and hurt.  Would I EVER measure up?  Would I EVER gain that acceptance for which I so long had craved...acceptance from others?


How patient God was with me.  My broken and hurting heart cried out to God for answers.  His response pierced my soul.  It shattered the ideas that I had for so long made the center of my universe.  He revealed to me that this "need" that I THOUGHT I had for the acceptance of others was, as harsh as it sounds, a form of idolatry.  I was more concerned with how other people perceived me...I was more enamored of MY ability to please others...than I was with God.  He was not the center of my universe.  So I dressed modestly...was it to show how modest of a Christian young lady I was...or was it because that is what pleases HIM?  Did I do it out of a passionate love and overwhelming desire to follow HIS wishes?  Or did I do it because I wanted to be a good little "Independent Baptist" girl?  I could go on and on about different areas of my life.  What WERE my motives?  Slowly, he opened up my wicked, selfish, and pharisaical heart.  He even brought up my past...the areas of violation and rejection that I had endured as a child.  He showed me how these things had also contributed to this horrible form of "Christian" idolatry that I had been practicing.  Unworthiness, shame, and guilt flooded my entire being.  God revealed to me exactly what I was.  He knew all along.  The person that I was trying to be to gain acceptance was merely a fascade to Him.  Then...the response that absolutely rocked my little world, "I know all these things about you...who you are...how you think...who your family is...what you have been through...how sinful and selfish you can REALLY be...and, guess what?  I love you and accept you anyway.  I always have...I always will.  I change not.  I know the thoughts that I have of you...thoughts of peace.  How precious are the thoughts that I think toward you.  You are wonderfully made.  I accept every fiber of your being...isn't that enough for you?"  


Acceptance.  True...pure...and unconditional acceptance can only come from one Person...God.  When Satan comes to get you to doubt...whether it be through a desire to be accepted by friends or even through that desire to be accepted by the opposite gender...remind him of Calvary.  The grace we received at Calvary is proof of His acceptance.  


Now, I walk into that same room...full of all those same people...and when that little pang of loneliness hits, I think of Him.  I'm not alone...He is with me.  Now I can confidently enjoy His people and try to be a blessing to THEM instead of needing THEM to accept me.  Such a freedom. 


I'm accepted.